Who Am I That You Are Mindful Of Me?

As I said before, life is beautiful right now, but God took it to a new level tonight. I won't go into too much detail, but I have to write something. I never think moments like this are on accident. Myself and my friends talk often. We spend the evenings with each other and chat; it's just part of our routine. Tonight, though, God led us into a deeper understanding of each other. It was incredible.

In college, you meet people from so many places. Some people you may have gone to highschool with. Some people live locally. Some people live across the country. Some people have lived 10 minutes from your house and you never knew until you met in a completely different place. You meet and develop friendships with people from everywhere, with different upbringing, different quirks, different struggles. Coming to college can be a bit overwhelming. Sometimes you feel alone despite all the life going on around you, but I think there's a deeper lonliness when you feel isolated in a circle of friends that you just assume won't understand your past. I think everyone has had a battle that they can't even imagine someone else has faced. And that may be true, but what I don't think most of us realize is that despite what our battles are or were, everyone has faced something.

God made us relational, but it's human nature to be selfish. It's not easy to take time, much less go out of your way to consider someone else's situation. But man, I love when God makes nights like these for us to just drop everything and surrender, to take a moment to realize that we're not alone in our struggles. And not just realize that, but to be able to uplift each other, be accountable for each other, and understand each other. God makes the time to think of us, and we do our best (sometimes) to make time to think of Him. We spend time deepening our relationship with God and understanding Him. So shouldn't it be obvious that we should make the time to think of others and deepen our understanding of each other?

Who am I that you are mindful of me
That you hear me, when I call
Is it true that you are thinking of me
How you love me, it's amazing

I am a friend of God
I am a friend of God
I am a friend of God
He calls me friend

God Almighty
Lord of Glory
You have called me friend

Blissfully Content

I hate that I forget about this blog so much. Every so often I stumble upon it and I definitely don't think it's on accident. Aside from my first post, all I ever write about is something I've been conflicted with or something I hope to achieve in the near future with my relationship with God. I forget sometimes to look at other parts of my life and be thankful for them.

I'm 2 weeks into my Junior year. I honestly can say that I can't think of anything being any better for me right now. I'm blissfully content. Sure, having a job would be a perk. Being in a relationship would be neat, but man, I haven't been this happy in a long time. God and I are great. I love my classes and am doing well in them so far. Friendships are beyond wonderful. Things just feel different, fresh, new, exciting.

I led a Bible study for the Junior High girls at my church this past Wednesday night and we talked about feelings. Simple I know, but it really stuck with me. We talked about how all feelings are good feelings, because they're gifts from God. It's how we react to our feelings that determine whether they are positive or negative. We talked a lot about how to react if we're upset or angry, but I really wish I had made more of an effort focusing on what to do with happy or thankful emotions. When we're upset our reactions can sometimes just explode out of us, so of course there's a need to learn how to control that and react to those situations with calm and clarity. But I find happy, especially thankful, emotions harder to display. When we're excited, yeah it shows, but what about happiness, thankfulness, contentment? I feel like sometimes I choke on it. Just before I do something to express my thanks to someone or tell them that I'm genuinely doing well, I stop.

After going through some emotional times in middle school and highschool I came to realize that a lot of what I was upset about wasn't the situations themselves, but how I looked at them. I realized through God that it wasn't the things in my life I needed to change, but how I looked at them and how I reacted. I learned to be optimistic about things, even grateful. And if there was something that did really need changing, then I would change it. I think I've forgotten how to look at life like that. My mom calls me Eeyore, because I'm so melancholy sometimes. I've learned how to react appropriately to my negative emotions, but I'm still struggling with how to react to the positive ones.

Ok, I just realized I'm talking about exactly what I didn't plan on talking about, but whatever. :-)

All this to say, things are fantastic right now. It's times in my life like these that I have to store in my mind and remember for when things aren't as bright. That's what keeps me going; remembering that moments like these will happen again. I want to not only cherish them, but take the time to remember who they come from and give thanks where thanks is due. So, I guess to put it simply, thanks God.


P.S. I just looked up the official definition for "bliss" and it says "a state of spiritual joy or perfect happiness." Isn't God just awesome?!